Ingrassia Meditates: Penis Intact and Looking Forward

Julien Ingrassia meditates on what he’s thankful for, potential penis-biting serpents notwithstanding.

No, no one thinks sack-tapping your mates at a party is as funny as you think it is. Even less so then, when one’s member is threatened by venomous snakes running amok. Julien Ingrassia illuminated the masses with his experience regarding toxic serpents in his fond reflection of his time spent at Volkswagen Motorsport, shortly after being crowned champion with his co-driver Sebastien Ogier.

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“I would like to thank the organizers of Rally Australia for saving my penis! I will explain… the organizers communicated that it is forbidden for us to pee in some places where they are fearful the snakes will bite. Thanks for this!”

– Julien Ingrassia

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Not one to waste a press release solely focusing on his schwang, Ingrassia also took a moment to look back on the unique facets of his lifestyle that he has had the privilege of experiencing – contemplative walks on the beach in full race attire.

“I came back to the hotel quite late from the service park, maybe 10 or 11 and I went for a walk on the beach dressed like this [in racing overalls]…These moments are the times when we remember we have the unique life. “ – Julien Ingrassia

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While Ingrassia and Ogier have made a stellar duo, all good things must come to an end. Yet, one can assume that the lifestyle of a prestigious Rally Car driver is not one they would be willingly to give up so easily. Both have issued statements saying there are seeking to confirm their future trajectory within WRC in the forthcoming weeks.

We can only wish that their records continue forward with the skill and passion they’ve so far demonstrated, and that both of their penile incidents are kept to a bare minimum.