Mesut Ozil, Please Don’t Go

The rumor mills have been churning this week and sources have said that Mesut Ozil has expressed a desire to return to Real Madrid where he previously spent 3 seasons from 2010 to 2013. The German magician was brilliant on the ball for Los Blancos, but was deemed surplus by new manager, Carlo Ancelotti. 

Ozil has joined Alexis Sanchez in becoming a contract rebel and is holding off the signing of a new deal at the Emirates, but the German international has revealed his list of demands in order to keep him in North London.

First Requirement: £200,000 a week

Stop being cheap, Arsenal. The man had 19 assists in the Premier League last season with a beautiful, but not the greatest striker in Olivier Giroud.

Honestly, that should be enough to win the Balon d’Or.

He’s a magician in the middle of the park and when he’s on the ball good things happen.

Second Requirement: Number 10 jersey from Jack Wilshere

With Jack Wilshere on loan at Bournemouth, the number 10 jersey is vacant.

I think this would be an easy enough fix. Wilshere hasn’t played a full match for the Gunners in God knows how long and isn’t deserving of wearing a jersey that was worn by the likes of Tony Woodcock, Dennis Bergkamp, and Judas Robin van Persie.

Let’s get rid of him.

Mesut Ozil is a true number 10 and deserves to wear the legendary jersey.

Getting rid of Wilshere leads me to Ozil’s last request…

Third Requirement: Bring in World Class Talent

Over the past few seasons, class talent has trickled in with the signings of Ozil, Sanchez, and Petr Cech, but for the most part, Arsene Wenger has been afraid to spend.

Wenger shocked everyone this summer by spending more than a £100 million in the transfer window by purchasing Granit Xhaka, Shkodran Mustafi, and Lucas Perez, but we need more.

The excess fat needs to be trimmed with Per Mertesacker, Carl Jenkison, and Jack Wilshere the first to go. Getting players with high wages off the books will allow for more money to be spent on better talent.

This is something that should be fixed anyways; it shouldn’t require Mesut Ozil in an old fashioned standoff to force the Arsenal board to see that.

Mesut Ozil, please don’t leave. Real Madrid is full of talent and you would just get lost in the sauce. They wouldn’t appreciate you like we do at the Emirates.

I know Giroud is shit at times, but I believe with Sanchez playing up top you won’t be so frustrated and worried that he’ll miss a sitter.

We plead you, nay, we beg you to stay. Good things are on the horizon, but we need you to lead the charge. Sign a contract, convince Alexis Sanchez to sign a contract, and we will (hopefully) win some trophies.