Forget the hockey, eh. Oh, sorry but why are Canadians better golfers than Americans? We have decided to look into some of the advantages Canadian golfers have over their counterparts in the states.
Canadians have a better grip on their clubs
Am I insinuating that Americans have weak grips or that they are not strong enough to swing a golf club through four grueling hours of golf? Absolutely not, what I’m saying is Canadians still have maple syrup on their hands from breakfast.
In Canada if you lightly tap any tree with a mallet it will produce the finest maple that has ever hit your American tastebuds. It’ll have you saying ‘oh, sorry’, in no time.
Shooting hockey pucks translates to better golf swings
I mean have you ever seen the movie Happy Gilmore? Clearly everything you see on the big screen can be emulated in real life with a 100 percent success rate. Just like wearing PF Flyers will make you run like Benny The Jet Rodriguez, or contacting the spirit world will win you the World Series.
Canadians are more friendly and have better sportsmanship
This was a given, have you ever met a Canadian who wasn’t understanding, friendly, and patient? I won’t wait for an answer because chances are you’ve hit a mental wall trying to come up with an answer.
Now that I think of it, Matt Kuchar may be partially Canadian. Think about how much grace and apathy he had for Jordan Spieth when he took three years to complete the 13th hole in the last round of last week’s Open Championship.
Alcohol won’t effect their golf game
Sure Americans, go ahead have a couple cold ones with the boys while you play the front nine. Just remember that couple cold ones turns into a six pack at the turn…and the next thing you know you’re day drinking like a frat boy in college. Running over your friends with golf carts and kissing your focus goodbye.
Alcohol, especially beer, never effects a Canadian’s focus or his golf swing. Ever try to out drink a Canadian? You probably don’t remember for obvious reasons…
Without question Canada should be the mecca for golf..not Europe. In fact they should rename The Open to the British Open and give The Open title to the Canadian Open. It only seems fitting. So the next time you play a Canadian in golf just remember to crack open a cold one and accept your inevitable loss before the first tee shot.