Throwback Heat: Time For The NBA To Bring Back Retro Jerseys

The saying “you don’t know what you have until it’s gone” is usually thrown around during breakups when kids sit in their dorm room upset about dumping their significant other to chase a little college tail for the first time, but it is true.

Having things taken away from us sometimes show us how much we need them. We’ve taken things like Vine, “The Office” before Steve Carrell left the show, and a world where the “cash me outside” girl didn’t have a rap career for granted. It’s not fair living in a world with that kind of future, so as a society we should have one freebie. That free pass should be used for one thing and one thing only- getting retro jerseys back in the NBA.

Retro jerseys have clearly been gone for a long time, thus the word “retro” but their need in the NBA has never been more necessary. After years of watching teams try new designs and butcher so many of them, we had the newest release with the league’s “statement jerseys”.

The jerseys gave us a few things. One of them was this incredible picture that has more chapters, twists, and turns than a Stephen King novel.

There’s just so many questions and so little time. Why does Eric Bledsoe look pissed off like someone just spoiled “Game of Thrones” for him? Why is Rodney Hood standing behind Bradley Beal acting like he just heard the most profound question in the entire universe? Why does Frank Ntilikina look like he’s about to hear a record scratch and say “you’re probably wondering how I got myself in this situation”? And for Godsakes, why is Shane Larkin there of all people for Boston?

The second thing it gave us? A reminder that we need to go retro.

Granted, there are some bright spots out of these jerseys. For example, the Thunder statement jerseys are absolute fire.

There are a few good ones. Boston’s is close to their alternate and aren’t too bad, the city structure in the background for both Dallas and Denver is solid, and the Sixers in script font is great. Having said that, there are some jerseys that belong lower than the earth’s core so we can make sure we never, ever see them ever again.

Like the Jazz jersey, for example, looks like the label of a Twisted Tea can.

Or the Timberwolves who look like they stole the Seahawks jersey and made it look much worse.

If teams were trying to make these jerseys and had no other options, that’s fine. Teams like the Hawks have no other choice. Their retro jerseys are the color of pea soup.

Other teams don’t have the same excuse. There are perfectly good retro jerseys that should be used on a nightly basis, but instead are just collecting dust, only to be worn every once in a while so we can all collectively wonder why we don’t see those bad boys more often. For example, why on earth would the Wolves go to a different route than these throwbacks?

"The Ying vs Yang "….. #RESPECT LIKE MFO…

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Those pine trees lining around the entire jersey is a style that should have never died. The font, the color, every single thing about it is phenomenal. Instead, this team is going to trot out that jersey that’s the same color of Tinkerbell’s dress. What about that color and design makes you think of a timberwolf?

Or how about getting the Jazz back to these colors, or the design that has the mountains in the background of the lettering for their retro jerseys? The same jerseys that would remind fans of the time where this team had the best pick and roll combo in the league with John Stockton and Karl Malone. Nope, that just makes too much sense. Now the Utah Jazz have the kind of jerseys that make them look like a New York City taxi cab.

You can look at each NBA team that has a dumpster fire of a jersey and find a retro jersey that can make your eyes hurt a lot less.

 

Who says no to retro jerseys that look like that? Getting the Pacers back to basics or even putting them back in the pinstripes? Perfect. Getting the Pistons away from the whole “motor city” idea and getting that horse come out of the fire? Bring those back. And do not even get me started on those Clippers jerseys that have the nautical flags on the pant leg. That’s genius.

While we’re on it, what in the world happened to starter jackets? They’re maybe a bit big and clunky but you can’t sit around and say these things don’t bring you back to the old days.

Anytime you see these, anything that even slightly resembles these, or any Starter apparel at all for that matter sitting in your local thrift store, you buy it as fast as humanly possible.

It’s a shame that this brand of retro has been thrust into stores where they’re sold for 10 bucks or less. It does nothing but brings us all back to a time where the NBA wasn’t about joining superteams or creating burner accounts. It was when the style of play was great and the jerseys were better.

If we cant get the old NBA back, the league might as well meet us halfway and give us our retro jerseys back.