The 6 Stages Of Wrapping Christmas Presents

Daniel Blazer
Daniel Blazer
Daniel Blazer
Managing Editor

Find a person who loves wrapping presents, and you’re looking into the eyes of a serial killer. However, that’s not to say, before the Christmas present wrapping stint begins, there’s the belief from the majority that this will be an enjoyable and wonderfully festive occasion.

How wrong could you, Santa’s little helpers, be!

Avoiding the awkwardly shaped ones

Nice box shaped gift set? Excellent, I’ll wrap that.

Only takes a minute for the whole thing to be neatly wrapped and placed under the tree – you are now feeling like you could’ve perhaps been a professional present wrapper.

Evenutally, though, you run out of boxes to wrap. And now you’re left with the octopus-shaped cushion that your eight-year-old cousin will so love.

But are they really worth the wasted paper, the wasted sellotape, the stress of failing upon your first four attempts to wrap the item or the hour it will take to wrap?

Nope, didn’t think so.

Missing In Action: Scissors

Are you even British if you don’t lose the scissors at least 20 times during the wrapping of the Christmas presents, including the frantic patting of the carpet around you?

Always solved by the fact your fellow Christmas wrapper is currently using them.

Which present is which?

Two identically shaped items, but one is a Lynx set for your Nan’s new boyfriend, and the other is a Nivea gift set for your Nan.

This situation will usually result in you going:

“Oh well, we will just laugh it off and swap them around if they open the wrong ones; it’s fine.”

The Great Wall Of Sellotape

It’s easy to work out how much sellotape you use each Christmas by following the simple flow chart below:

Are you wrapping a present? —– Yes —-> You will use enough sellotape to fill a multi-storey car park.

Ribbons

Every year you buy the whole decorative section of Clintons: ribbons, glitter, tassels, tinsel, sequins. However, when that first present looks like something you made in art class at Primary School, you quickly lose heart, and convince yourself that:

“Well, they’ll only be putting a tag on mine, anyway.”

You End Up Hating Christmas Films And Songs

There’s nothing better than wrapping presents whilst Chris Rea drives you home for Christmas or the Grinch falls back in love with the festive season.

And that is absolutely true, until you actually live that experience.

The film goes by without you watching any, you feel like the Mariah Carey song has been on for 45 minutes straight and the present pile isn’t shrinking.

Better off watching Silence Of The Lambs.

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